Friday, January 18, 2013

Youth Pastor's Conference

Goodness gracious!!! Wow, did I have a good time at the Youth Pastor's conference!!!!

I can't tell you we had crazy amazing events or anything, but God really did a work in my heart! This blessed me so greatly that I would take these days learning in His presence over a thousand elsewhere...
Is it better to gain the whole world and forfeit my soul? (Mark 8:36)

I have been born again for 15 years now, but a good many years of those were eaten by the locusts. I do believe that God allowed this to grow me more into the woman He wants me to be.  I was still baring fruit in my life, but a lot of it was simply getting eaten away.
"I will repay you the years that the swarming locust has eaten, the creeping locust, the stripping locust, and the gnawing locust, My great army which I sent among you" (Joel 2:25)

About 4 years ago I really began to feel God starting to restore those eaten years. My family moved into a large home with my in-laws in 2008.
That alone made it a trying time, but not long after the move my baby brother almost died, this caused a snow ball effect for other life changing things to happen.

During his 4 months in the hospital I was breaking down and getting torn apart.  There were many family struggles and hurtful words said. The support system I thought I had in place really broke down on me.  God wanted to show me that He was all I needed. He had a plan.

I started going to a Christian Physiologist soon after. God used this time to show me He wanted to put the broken pieces of me back together again. His plan of healing consisted of me being broken down again. Did you know a fractured bone can be stronger after it's been broken? Well, God wanted to work on my rebelliousness and call me even closer to Himself.

He called us out of our church... and to say the least, this transition was not a smooth one. He definitely used it for our good.  During this move He took me to my Damascus road and He removed the scales from my eyes.

With our church move, we ended up moving to a new home as well.
At our new church I have a beautiful group of friends and these were some of the friends I was at this conference with. I am happy to have my roots grow deep here and also to have them be intertwined with the roots of my friends as we withstand trials together.

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I know a lot of what God showed me this week was things I simply needed to be reminded of, but I am excited in the fact that a promise has been made to me. A promise that God is restoring by broken vessel.
You see He told me my obedience here is just the beginning. He said "go home and turn not, for in doing so you will turn it upside down".  I have been convicted for too many years to tear down the idols that have been built up in my family from generation to generation. I took this issue strongly to the Lord in prayer, I gave this to Him, and that was my obedience.  You see these idols have torn parts of my family to pieces and I don't want that to happen to me and my husband, or to my children or their children, I want to turn things upside down in The Lord's name!

I am convicted to be a woman of action, and I am excited to say that I don't think I have ever felt as much hope as I do now!  I actually am excited about obedience!  That is CRAZY for me!

What's even MORE crazy is all these years I have learned of God's grace, and even taught of His grace... but I never allowed myself to receive that grace. In my own pride I always believed I didn't deserve it even though teaching it, I know it is something that no one deserves.

My youth pastors years ago always taught me that it had to be more than head knowledge, it had to be heart knowledge. Now my pastor as of late has been teaching on how this grace has to drop... drop from your head to your heart! Listening to these messages have been frustrating because I knew this was not something I could simply WILL to happen within myself, so I prayed and I'm pretty sure I was even grieving over it.

Well this week, it DROPPED!

I realized after listening to Pastor Levi Lusko's first message, along with thinking on my son's 7-11 story (which I don't think I've written) and how we could have lost him, but we didn't... but Pastor Levi lost his daughter!

This was when I really understood grace! I don't deserve my children! They are a gift! I didn't deserve for God to keep my son safe, but He did... I could have woke up in the morning with my front door wide open and my son gone! But God brought my son back home to me! "How does a mom go through this and flipping NOT understand grace?" I said this weeping... ...then I realized it dropped.

I realized this is exactly how God's grace is for me in all things. ALL of them. I don't deserve it, but HE loves me, so He gives it, amazing!

Monday, January 14, 2013

Out this week...

I'm at a youth Pastor's conference with my hubby and good friends. We got up before 4am, so it's already been a long day, but the conversation has been enjoyable and the fellowship sweet!

These kind of things make me so excited for the day we all will be together for eternity! I love it!!!
Geez! I have a big mouth! hahaha

Sunday, January 13, 2013

Happy Sunday!

Awww! Church friend flashback!
This is so adorable!  This is my two girls (in the middle) with their two sister friends that used to go to our church.  They are really very missed, my daughter talks about them all the time, it's sad when friends move away.

Like my little one and her Alfalfa hair?! It's from when her brother chopped her hair off!

Saturday, January 12, 2013


I LOVE this pic of my hubby! It's from our anniversary 2 years ago...

I'm so excited for him, he gets to go see his first NFL football game today!  We've been to collage games together, but he's never seen the pros!

My hubby loves football in person more than watching it on tv, here is a pic of him on New Year's day after the annual football game our church men like to play.

I LOVE watching him play! I always tell him I want him to coach someday.

Our youngest son already loves football (notice his football jammies? :) maybe my hubby will coach for his team someday.

Friday, January 11, 2013


She looks happy here, but she was just a trooper!

Not long after I last updated in 2011 my youngest daughter cut her hand and needed stitches!  I have had crazy experiences with my son running in the street and giving him the heimlich maneuver but never any real emergency room type accidents.

Poor thing, she tripped with a plate in her hand and landed on a broken piece when she caught herself on the floor. When I saw her hand I could see straight through to the muscle in her thumb!!!

She was amazing letting me tape it shut, she was amazing in the car and the nurses when she got there were amazed by her as well!  Such a strong little girl!  I love her so much!

Here she is all casual in the doctor's office now.  Even after all she went through, she is not scared of going back.

I thought it was funny how she was sitting there like a little woman! :)

I can't believe she's turning 5 this month!!!

Thursday, January 10, 2013

I am so Blessed

Wow I am amazed at how sweet you guys are, coming in and checking on me.  Thank you Crafty Mama of Four for visiting me even when my blog was not in the land of the living! :)

And you too Mary, especially for telling me you missed me!!!
This blesses me more than you know.

So, let me try to fill in the past 2 years - oye!

My Blog...
Well obviously it hasn't been very appealing to me, I have been all over Facebook, more recently on Instagram and I'm now new to Pinterest which I LOVE!  Most of that has been from my phone, which is another huge reason I don't blog... I just don't often get on my computer anymore.

As I come back I realize I like things more simplified now.  The layout of my blog before was driving me away.  I wasn't quite ready to let go of my framed pictures yet though.


As you my have noticed from the updated pics...
I am now blonde... my hubby has a beard...
my kids are HUGE...

AND... there is an extra stranger in this picture here.  That's my lil brother, he's been living with us for about 7 months now.  He was living with our oldest sister and her 5 kids, but her hubby passed away in May, so we took the responsibility of him off her hands.

We plan on moving very soon, possibly buying a house.  This is both terrifying and exciting all at once!  All 7 of us are currently in a 2 bedroom apartment!

I am no longer homeschooling my children.

I still struggle with depression, but I fight it MUCH better now.
Let's see... I really wanted to dreadlock my hair, but found I get traction alopecia from the pulling tension of even smaller braids.

Health & Fitness...

I am now around 145 lbs.  This is 10 pounds below what I told you my last goal was.  I still have maybe another 5 or 10 pounds to go... depends on muscle.

I DID finish another round of P90x and now I have moved on to TurboFire! I like this program a lot!  All the intense cardio we do does great things for my fatty tummy!  The HIIT training makes me sweat harder than P90x ever did... well other than Plyo!

I am not currently on top of my game with eating clean... I have also been sick as of late and do not find enough energy for my work out videos.

I haven't been scrapping much at all.  I have most my stuff packed away for moving, but I do plan on picking it back up to at least finish a baby album for each of my children.  The first 3 LOVE looking at their albums, so I definitely cannot NOT make one for my littlest man!

My Walk...
Just yesterday I was reading back on a note my friend wrote for me in 2009.  She had taken notes on what I was struggling with at the time, and now 3 years later it was really nice to see how much has really changed.  God is so good in my life.  I love Him now more than I did yesterday, and I pray that is how it will ALWAYS be.

Thanks for visiting guys, I will see you again soon.