Monday, January 24, 2011

The Cloud I've been Hiding In

I haven't been blogging much lately.
I've really been out of sorts with things these past two months or so.
I am just now finding my desire for interests again.

And now that I feel I am back into the swing of life again and am remembering THIS post from November and I am thinking back on having my other babies. I always went through about a 3 month funk! Whatever that funk is attributed to (postpartum depression, sleep deprivation, life-style adjustments, spiritual warfare, selfishness...) I feel I'm adjusting and coming out from behind the cloud now :)! Thank the Maker.

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Let me attempt at an update with the few pics I have taken from within "the cloud".

Back in September I became an Independent Mary Kay Beauty Consultant :) My first quarter through the middle of December went well as I was really trying to follow a work plan and set goals for myself. The start of my second quarter was very slow and now that I am "awake, alive" (see video below) and interested again it is all picking back up. God is faithful when I put even the smallest effort, He is good to bless me :).

This picture is meant to show you that I finally picked a lip color for myself :)...

While ditching out on MK goals and spending time trying to sleep or tv (= movies on my laptop, E.R. online, or Glee) my problems away my adorable little man has been growing like a weed! So cute he is! Squish-able in point of fact...

Even when I was at my worst these little people God is letting me borrow would smile at me and I knew I was still okay somewhere deep down...

Also while my little man was growing like a weed, my older girl turned 6!...

My younger girl turned 3...

And yes that big little man turned 6 months old! A whole 1/2 a year when it has seemed more like 2 months...

I LOVE him! He still smiles and giggles in his sleep. He is starting to roll a lot more on the floor not minding to be on his tummy. He will probably be in a size 4 diaper soon and is wearing mostly 9 month clothes. He has been eating rice cereal for about a week now and I think is definitely teething with the amount of drooling, gnawing, waking and fussiness. Clearly his favorite person is his Daddy and his favorite thing is a toss-up between the bouncer and his fuzzy blankie :)
Don't you just wanna chew on him? Muh!...

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If you actually read my post and didn't just scroll through my pictures and comment (which I am guilty of doing occasionally) you might wonder what I meant by mentioning being "awake and alive".
It's one of my favorite songs, by probably my favorite Christian band.

The song talks about being at war and being pulled into the dark (my cloud).
Lord I've struggled to find my faith as I've let myself slip from your arms. It's been hard to stay awake since I ironically wanted to sleep to escape the numbness, that feeling that seemed to drain my strength. But You've breathed into me and now I am awake and alive again! I'm fighting! I'll do what You want. I give You my life. I stand my ground. Help me not to back down! You've woken me up, thank You! I give You my heart. I give You my life.

Now out of that cloud hopefully I will once again be a "living" part of the community both blog and otherwise again :).

Thanks for reading - please comment so I know you are here too :).

May you always walk and talk with Jesus!


Jodi said...

Great pictures! You have a gorgeous family! Thanks so much for stopping by my blog tonight and for your kind words! :)


Jen said...

SO glad to see you back here in bloggy land!! You have a beautiful family.

I could not keep up more than one blog. I have a hard enough time keeping my main one updated. So they are all thrown into one. I like it a lot better. Seems like a mess sometimes...much like life. But it all works out in the end!!

PEA said...

thank you for sharing this video. I have never heard this song. Yes, the Lord is using you to bless others. Some days are good, some bad, some just okay.Each one a blessing and a lesson to be learned. Each day will bring what you lacked the day before.
Bless you for your walk in faith.

Tracy said...

Beautiful pic of your family.
That colour looks beautiful on you.
You know you are still being creative when you are thinking about it. Some days I don't make anything, but I am always thinking about it. Maybe try a card. Or cover a journal, and write your thoughts in it.
Thank you for your very sweet comment on my blog today.

L2L said...

Hey there!!! Thanks for dropping by!!!! Things have been crazy and I got a bit overwhelmed with the computer thing, still am but I feel like my head is above water, at least!!! So great to see such wonderful pics of your children. And you know what, I use to have a chair just like the green one with the wooden feet, just got rid of it this summer. Thanks for the walk down memory lane, lol!!!! Oh and the lipstick looks great!!!!

Carl Holland said...

I see you pour your heart out on here and show that you're a real person with real issues. Your children are simply adorable. You stated that God is faithful even when we put forth the smallest effort. He is faithful even when we AREN'T! I noticed your last post was in February. It looks like you were faithfully blogging for a while, stopped, tried to start again, and stopped again. I've been through some stuff like that myself. Life threw me more curve balls than I could swing at, which I talked about in my post about being a Nike Christian. I want to encourage you, my sister in Christ, to keep your chin up because you are a PRINCESS! You are a child of the KING!