My Walk

After watching a new Veggie Tails Video with my kids this morning (thank you DeAnna) I feel like God has clarified the conviction in my heart. It has been hard to be obedient in becoming a Mary Kay Beauty Consultant because I am not one that is into fashion and make-up wearing 24-7.

Not that that is all Mary Kay is about, because it's not, but in my obedience my enemy has been trying to fill my thoughts with a number of lies and discouragements.

This video (meant for my kids, but ministered to me) really showed me that the feeling in my heart, the conflict against selling "beauty products" is that I need to focus on making my heart, my motives, my intentions and my self beautiful on the inside first.

And even more so, then God will be able to use me as a beauty consultant for His kingdom! :)

I am doing this in obedience to Him, but I also want to make sure I am doing it FOR Him. What you pour into a vessel is what you will get out of it. If I pour in the beauty of His word, prayer, fellowship, and encouragement to the woman I am in contact with I know HIS beauty will be much better than my own :).

My Walk Monday

I'm struggling today, I just want to run to sleep instead of Jesus. If I sleep my troubles will magically disappear, right? Here I am now, I may not look like I am fighting the battle, but I am because I am getting in His word and am not asleep!

Anyway...

I know I must seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and the rest of my life should fall in line. It is on my heart to take each day at a time, so here I go...

I have decided I work well off of goals and plans, and I know I have not read my Bible all the way through... so though it may take me more than a year I decided that I am going to follow a yearly reading plan that gives me a little bit of the new and old testament everyday.

Happy Baby - Crazy Mommy!

This makes me happy! How 'bout you? :)

My postpartum depression has kicked in! Just this past week or so. Please pray for me.

• It is hard to be agitated and irritable when you have 4 kids.
• It is hard to cry at the drop of a hat (or a cup of water, or a loud toy, or some food on the carpet, you get my point).
• It is hard not to be able to sleep when you know you will need the sleep the next day.
• It is hard when my memory goes out the window about something important that my husband shared with me when I then want to argue with him that he did not tell me and I am crying saying I wish he would have warned me first.
• It is hard feeling like I don't do anything right and I am a no good mommy!
• It is hard to feel withdrawn from the outside world when you are actually there!
• It is hard not to enjoy what I know I would usually enjoy!
• It is hard that all I want to do is sleep when all I have to do doesn't get done, then I cry about it not getting done!
• It is hard to not be able to handle the cry of my own baby!!!

Please pray for me.

All things are possible with God.

He will never give us something we cannot handle.

Though my weakness He is strong.

He will never leave me, nor forsake me.

With Him nothing is impossible!