My Walk

After watching a new Veggie Tails Video with my kids this morning (thank you DeAnna) I feel like God has clarified the conviction in my heart. It has been hard to be obedient in becoming a Mary Kay Beauty Consultant because I am not one that is into fashion and make-up wearing 24-7.

Not that that is all Mary Kay is about, because it's not, but in my obedience my enemy has been trying to fill my thoughts with a number of lies and discouragements.

This video (meant for my kids, but ministered to me) really showed me that the feeling in my heart, the conflict against selling "beauty products" is that I need to focus on making my heart, my motives, my intentions and my self beautiful on the inside first.

And even more so, then God will be able to use me as a beauty consultant for His kingdom! :)

I am doing this in obedience to Him, but I also want to make sure I am doing it FOR Him. What you pour into a vessel is what you will get out of it. If I pour in the beauty of His word, prayer, fellowship, and encouragement to the woman I am in contact with I know HIS beauty will be much better than my own :).

My Walk Monday

I'm struggling today, I just want to run to sleep instead of Jesus. If I sleep my troubles will magically disappear, right? Here I am now, I may not look like I am fighting the battle, but I am because I am getting in His word and am not asleep!

Anyway...

I know I must seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and the rest of my life should fall in line. It is on my heart to take each day at a time, so here I go...

I have decided I work well off of goals and plans, and I know I have not read my Bible all the way through... so though it may take me more than a year I decided that I am going to follow a yearly reading plan that gives me a little bit of the new and old testament everyday.

Happy Baby - Crazy Mommy!

This makes me happy! How 'bout you? :)

My postpartum depression has kicked in! Just this past week or so. Please pray for me.

• It is hard to be agitated and irritable when you have 4 kids.
• It is hard to cry at the drop of a hat (or a cup of water, or a loud toy, or some food on the carpet, you get my point).
• It is hard not to be able to sleep when you know you will need the sleep the next day.
• It is hard when my memory goes out the window about something important that my husband shared with me when I then want to argue with him that he did not tell me and I am crying saying I wish he would have warned me first.
• It is hard feeling like I don't do anything right and I am a no good mommy!
• It is hard to feel withdrawn from the outside world when you are actually there!
• It is hard not to enjoy what I know I would usually enjoy!
• It is hard that all I want to do is sleep when all I have to do doesn't get done, then I cry about it not getting done!
• It is hard to not be able to handle the cry of my own baby!!!

Please pray for me.

All things are possible with God.

He will never give us something we cannot handle.

Though my weakness He is strong.

He will never leave me, nor forsake me.

With Him nothing is impossible!

Starting Monday Right

So it's been over 4 months since I last blogged for My Walk Monday! So sad because I KNOW this is a good thing for me. I was actually reminded of it by a very sweet blog friend (Angela at Free Spirit Haven) who wrote a couple comments to me recently. She said she hadn't come by in a while and it made me remember I always used to see her when she was doing My Walk Monday all the time. I miss her! I miss you all - my blog friends!

So what about my walk for the week?

Yesterday at church I was blessed to be thinking on things we can sacrifice for the Lord, or ways that we can lose our life to gain it. The first thing the Lord showed me when I was thinking was that I can sacrifice my time.... I can sacrifice rest and laziness :). Recently He has called me into starting a home business with Mary Kay. This has been filling my schedule quite a bit, along with homeschooling, homemaking and mommying 4 kids 5 and under. I love that He also used this to give me confirmation on the new busyness I have, so I know I don't need to let anything go :).

Also recently I have been reading little bits at a time out of Acts 1. As I said I was super blessed to have confirmation from the Lord, but I am also excited to know He cares to comfort us :).

Acts 1 : 10 & 11 during Christ's Ascension into heaven they gazed intently into the sky while He was going... I would imagine if I were in their shoes that this would be a sad time for me, I would not being seeing Him again. But two men in white clothing stood beside them saying, "Men of Galilee, why do you stand looking into the sky? This Jesus, who has been taken up from you into heaven, will come in just the same way as you have watched Him go into heaven." - so comforting and encouraging that God would send two angels to stand with them right at this time and share this happy news with them!

How much more does He want to comfort us in other sad times, or times of need? I love Him for this!

This was a very sweet way to start my day this morning :).

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Hmmm... I would also like to share a new song I learned yesterday morning during worship...

I just loved it...

It is called "God of this City" and it's by Chris Tomlin...

Let us lose our lives, get out of ourselves and BE there for others! Let us love on the people He loves! He calls us to greater things, we only have to be willing to accept the gifts He gives. He alone gives hope, He alone gives peace, there is no one like our God!

Update on Homeschooling

It's been over a month and a half now :).

It was all so exciting at the beginning, and it still is, to be able to see the way my daughter thinks and processes thought is amazing to me! She is a lot like her daddy and I think he is a genius in many ways!

We got sick two weeks ago which truthfully made me FAR too lax with our starting time, which then rolled over into a bad habit for last week! Tomorrow - for the start of this next week I am determined for this habit not to continue!

My daughter is doing so well though, regardless of our "flexible" schedule. She is flying through math like it is all review even though she never went to pre-school to officially learn these basics (she just loves knowledge:).

Language arts is going great for her. She is loving all the different fairy-tails and definitely enjoys making alternate endings and illustrations of her own!

Here is a picture I took while we were acting out scenes from Cinderella :)...

Phonics she flies right through as well even though she has never done it. She knows that this is what will teach her to read, which she has so wanted for about a year now! She has had certain books memorized by recognizing what is going on in the illustrations for a while!

This is JJ during Phonics tugging her ear to show me that a certain word had the "secret sound" we were looking for :) so cute!

Art and Music are OBvioUSly great fun! She loves to spend extra time in art class. And as for music, she memorizes the songs so sticking fast!!! I am so proud, she recognizes melodies and rhythm so well. She even sings the songs so often just through her day of play that her little brother and sister as learning her songs as well!

Science and History are so new to her that she gets a little frustrated sometimes when she has to try a little harder to pay attention, but she really does enjoy learning! I am even re-learning some of the things I know I have forgotten from History. We have been taking a "trip" of Europe and she is doing well well recognizing all the different countries on that continent!

Last week learning about the Netherlands we made a dike and canal out of play-doh. See "Mr. Traveler" there safe on the land? :)!

We have even made some time to involve my older little man who will be in Kindergarten next year. Just since his older sister has started school he has sprouted into quite the artist! We are so proud of him!

We are also very excited to say that our son is now Born-again! I make time for a little worship, Bible time and prayer most morning (sadly not every morning depending on when we start). But during one of those times he wanted to pray to welcome Jesus to come and live in his heart! :)

Actually just this morning JJ was "preaching" at my husband... "Daddy did you know that you have to be born twice to go to heaven? You have to let Jesus in your heart which means you are born-again. Daddy are you born-again?" I LOVE LOVE LOVE that she asked him this because it shows just how much she cares for him, she cares about his eternal well-being! ... preach it sister... I mean daughter! :)

Thank You Lord. I definitely see where You have given us these kids as a blessing and a reward, though I don't often feel worthy I do always feel thankful! I love You!

A correct depiction...

... of how I am feeling right now :) ...

(My little man yawning September 1st 2010)

Food for Thought

"There comes a moment when you have to stop revving up the car and shove it into gear." -David Mahoney

"If nothing changes, nothing changes."

I'm ready to take steps to bring on some good chances, how about you?

My kids Cut their Hair!

I found all three of them in their room with three pairs of scissors.

They each had their own pair like they were cutting each other's hair!

There was hair on the ground.

I tried not to overreact.

I accessed my oldest daughter first, who was not too bad, only self angled bangs.

Then my son, no problem we could always cut his ALL short.

But when I got to my youngest I acting started to cry silently. Not like it wouldn't grow back. But it was just so short and choppy all over the place. The photos didn't accurately show half the disaster. There were 1/2 inch pieces sticking out all over the place! I was more worried about how to fix it and sad about the fact that this was her baby hair.

She gave herself her first haircut!...

I called my husband first.

Then later on when I was ready to talk about the problem, I called my friend whom is amazing with hair and I knew she would be willing to help.

She is a great job. So cute.

No worries we didn't cut it all short, she just pulled the rest back all cute like.

And JJ got some straight bangs as well :) Nice smile for the camera huh?

If only I could keep those well-cut bangs in order all the time on my own!

Mommy is not the hair dressing natural that her friend is :) Thank you friend!!!

Laundry Laundry Laundry!!!

Umm... I don't need a bed tonight, lol!!!

Balloons, Barf, Baptisms and My Baby oh my!

Balloons

On Saturday we all enjoyed a beautiful birthday party for a one year old friend of ours... balloon man and all :)

Here is my youngest lady with her "fissie"...

... my brave man with his "hord and heild"...

And my lady with her "kiddy and ball"...

Barf

Just after that birthday party on Saturday my son threw up all over the back seat of our car, poor little guy. We attributed it to all the sweets and possibly the bubble solution since he was fine all night.

Though my oldest daughter threw up in her bed that night, poor little lady. I was still thinking it must have been that candy, my kids are NOT used to me letting them have that much candy!

Warfare? Write it off, write if off, write it off... yes three times... but not until we already had been through church service, lunch, shopping and a car ride to the beach!

As soon as we were getting out of the van at the beach B.boy threw up all over the back of Mini :( still in the car! (You can imagine our car smells wonderful!) At that point I said "lets just go home" but I totally wasn't thinking it! I was thinking "warfare!"

So we stayed, and actually little Mister had fun until he got cold and hungry...

And Mini was quite the sweetness in handling puke all in her hair, down her back, on her bum, down her legs and in her shoes!!! She just wanted to go to the beach...

Baptisms

The reason why I kept thinking Warfare!...

... I got baptized! I will blog my heart on the subject another time (hopefully soon).

... blessed obedience...

My Baby! oh my!

She started Kindergarten today! We started homeschooling today! This was me waking her up at 8:30 a.m. to make sure we could start around 9:00...

... the name tag at her desk...

... her waiting patiently for her first subject...

... she jumped right in...

... and LOVED it! I knew she would... I am so proud of her...

... I can't believe she is such a little woman already and that she will be 6 before the year ends!

* Sniffle * Sniffle *

Lord may I ask for?

Last night while I was laying in bed trying to make myself fall asleep I was thinking of what a good day I had. And when I cannot sleep I pretty much always pray.

But while I was praying over the things that made my day good I realized a lot of things that could have made it bad as well. Then I starting thinking I didn't want to ask God for another day like this, but that I needed to ask Him to help me keep my attitude positive and my motivation for Him.

I had a great day yesterday. Not only because I got to sleep in, but I also got myself up and going easily after that. This has never been an easy task for me, even without kids; most days I am in my jammies all day! I got the dishes done. I did four loads of laundry, folded it and put it away. But I also was finally able to really COOK again! I haven't been cooking our dinners for a while now.

I was able to make my Baked Zitti Casserole which actually feeds us for over three dinners, so two of the dishes are in the freezer. I was also able to get a head start on today's dinner which is Beef and Potato Burritos. Since I was already cutting onion and garlic I set some aside to cook the meat and potatoes for today, and I put it in the fridge.

I am so happy I prepared the meat/potato mix ahead of time because grilling those twenty burritos took a while. I DO like that twenty burritos is a lot for my family, so I put half of them in the freezer for yet another meal! :)

I also planned ahead again for tomorrow :) Tomorrow will be the Sausage Alfredo Lasagna so I got the meat all cooked in the same pan from grilling the burritos and I layered the lasagna and put it in the fridge. This is extra good because tomorrow we have a birthday party to go to, so who knows if I would have gotten dinner going otherwise!

I think this is how I always want to cook. It makes loads of sense! Especially with four little ones around :). Thank You Lord for the inspiration!

Such a Sweetie!

I refuse to give my little man a pacifier.

We let our oldest have one and don't want to go back! It was worse then a blankie or a thumb anyday. My older little man sucks his thumb, but only when he has his blankie for bed-time. And my littlest lady sucks on her blanket like a pacifier.

So instead of buying my newborn a binky I help him find this thumb or this fingers to comfort himself with :) obviously he is satisfied :)

Getting ready to Homeschool!

My oldest little girl is starting Kindergarten on Monday... sniff sniff.

I will be homeschooling her K-12 style, which is pretty much public school at home with me as her teacher. I signed her up at the beginning of this month after having my newest baby. It was a little late, but still good since we received all her (free) school supplies in the mail yesterday!

She was so excited! Three big boxes all for her! Not mommy's scrapbooking supplies, but JJ's school supplies! :)

I must admit though, I was a little sad they didn't send her a computer. I filled out a computer request form and our paperwork was approved, but I'm not sure if that means we were approved for a computer. We'll see.

This is her adorable EXCITED face! :)

We opened the three boxes tonight after dinner. Lo and behold, there were eight more boxes inside! We will be going through those tomorrow when we organize the "school cabinet".

For now we were just content to get the main boxes opened and emptied...

I love that they always love playing with them! I didn't take pictures, but I let them all color on their own box after they played in them for a while :).

Good night!

My new Favorite Pic!

Thank you sister, you are amazing!!!

I LOVE how Newborns sleep!

LOVE the humming...

LOVE the eye rolling...

LOVE the giggling...

LOVE the smiling...

LOVE the random breathing...

LOVE the frowning...

LOVE the whimpering...

LOVE the mouth twitches...

My baby #4 almost 4 weeks old :)

Sigh - Ministry Days!

What's up with me and the kids always having bad days on Tuesdays?!

I think it was last Tuesday my youngest daughter threw her head at mine trying to lay down next to me first thing in the morning. I couldn't see straight, I was nauseous, and I had a bump on my forehead all day.

That same daughter also dropped and broke a ceramic plate while trying to carry it to the counter, in the process a piece of the plate cut her face :(

Also my son had what looked like a black eye because he and (again) my younger daughter were out of their beds the night before playing. When daddy went in to check on them, they went running towards their beds and ran dead into each other! Again my daughter's hard head probably hit him. He woke up with a nasty bruise just beneath his eye :(

On top of all this my newborn was not keeping his milk down. Right after I nurse him he spits up, almost every time.

I did find out later in the week that he probably has acid reflux.

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Wow after looking at how LAST week's Tuesday was, today is not so bad :) My forehead no longer hurts to touch, my daughter's face is healed, my son's bruise is much lighter, and my newborn is on a small dose of Zantac to help him keep his milk down :) Things I can now see to be thankful for.

No wonder God showed me three times over in the last week...

"This is the day the Lord has made, I will rejoice and be glad in it." Psalm 118:24

Also I think I now see that in these bad days instead of letting my husband bless me, take the night off from youth group and manage the house all night - we should force ourselves out of the house, because OBVIOUSLY the enemy wants us not to go.

I confess - I still want to give in, it just seems easier.

But I know we will be all the more welcomed showing up all battered and beaten, LOL!!!

Birth Story and Pictures

Baby was born Sunday July 18th just past 3:00 in the morning.

7 pounds 6 ounces and beautiful!!!

As far as a week and a half before his birth date I had quite a few "bad" nights. One of those nights I actually had an hour of contractions four minutes apart. This only had me, my hubby and a lot of friends more anxious for him to come :) I tried to wait patiently as I wanted him to cook in there as long as he needed (he still had two weeks to go). But my patience was running out... I started telling my hubby he was never going to come. Last Saturday was his actual due date.

At my appointment on the 13th I was 2 cm dilated, 70% effaced, and baby was at a -2 station. Since that check I had increasing signs that he would be coming sooner than he was due.

I don't know what made me feel like Saturday the 17th would be the day (maybe because two of my other babies were born on 17th's as well) but I was getting cave sick! Hubby and I decided to take the kids for a walk to the park (about 2 miles both ways). Then I took a nap and when I woke up we went for a swim (after a little emotional meltdown mind you). During the swim I had quite a few contractions but could not tell how bad they were because of the water, so we decided to get out and get in the house where I could feel them better and time them. We also wanted to get dinner because I was super hungry.

By the time I got changed after swimming I laid down on the bed and practically feel right to sleep again. My hubby was trying to figure out what I wanted for dinner and when I told him I was no longer hungry he knew something had changed.

While my hubby was out with the kids picking up something to eat I had 5/6 heavier contractions. They did not stop after he came home so we called the faithful babysitter (Auntie Mena) and my doctor.

Here I am right about then...

My doctor asked if I wanted to go to the hospital to get checked, but I said not just yet. I wanted to eat and shower and see if it would all just go away like some of the contractions I had the previous week.

I called a good friend of mine over to see if she would bring me a movie to watch and her exercise ball to sit on. I also invited her to come to the hospital with me :) and she did!

Of coarse the car-ride to the hospital stopped my contractions as usual... but it was still good we went in. I was 5/6 cm when I got there and decided to walk the halls a bit which got things going again, but after monitoring baby a bit they decided no more walking. His heart-rate was showing he didn't like contractions, but it was also dipping between contractions. We changed my position, started me on oxygen and got my iv going.

My doctor wasn't liking the baby's variables, so she decided to break my water and get an internal fetal monitor going. I knew this would get things going for sure, I was getting a little anxious, I was telling Josh "here goes - this is it!".

After this I went from 5 to 7 to 9 cm and wanting to push, all within 2 hours. My doctor was amazing, my husband was amazing, the nurses were amazing and baby did very well.

ABOVE ALL GOD IS GOOD!

As always I cried as soon as I saw him. He nursed very well soon after that and after me hogging him for about a half an hour my hunny finally got to hold him :)

Here we are...

After baby was all fed, checked, dressed, swaddled and ready to rest we got ready to move into a new room.

Here we are in the wheelchair...

I got about two hours of sleep that morning before I woke up wondering when breakfast would come :) I was starving!

And of coarse I couldn't go back to sleep because I had to stare some more at my new baby :)

I love that he was already making yummy faces...

Here he is getting a little disturbed by our family coming to visit...

The evening of the 20th we came home, the kids were so excited as you can see...

Baby was happy to be home as well :)...

On the 25th - when he was a week old - we went on a car ride to visit Auntie Charleen and her new baby born just two weeks before mine. She is also our professional photographer :)

There are others she took that I liked also, but I only have these from her facebook page :)

Here is a pic she took that day of her baby...

So precious! My baby is already 2 weeks and 2 days old. Giggling, smiling and frowning in his sleep... already growing out of the smallest clothes he has and no longer in a newborn diaper... nursing almost every two hours on the dot... and he loves to stare at his daddy more than anyone else!

Here we are now... he is hanging with me while I blog...

We hope to blog again soon. God bless!